It’s not like your engineer is autistic – okay, maybe he has a touch of autism, but we can safely ignore that for now, can’t we?
What he doesn’t like is getting outside his comfort zone – especially in social situations. A vacation is just another social situation, and a potential minefield to your engineer! He knows that some people actually form lifetime bonds after meeting on a vacation – but he has no first hand evidence that this is anything more than a rumor!
Your engineer is sort of like a social butterfly – flitting from flower to flower looking for the right place to rest. Unfortunately, the analogy ends right there. The butterfly is always welcome to return to any place previously visited. The engineer – not so much!
So how do you help that awkward social butterfly actually enjoy himself while traveling?
First, book a trip to a resort or on a cruise that includes a Social Director – someone whose job is to help strangers mingle. That way, your engineer won’t have to worry about what he will be doing on any particular day – it’s on the posted schedule, so no high pressure thinking about connecting with others is required from your engineer! It’s a bonus that the Social Director has the skills to smooth over the occasional ruffled feather that always seems to come up in his wake!
Second, take charge of your social calendar during the trip! This is important for three reasons!
- If you don’t take charge, you won’t HAVE a social calendar. Let’s be honest. What are the chances that anyone would invite the two of you to sit with them over dinner if they’ve only met your engineer!
- Your engineer will be less stressed handling the things he knows how to do well – for instance instructing the staff of the resort or cruise ship on ways to be more efficient!
- If, by some unbelievable fluke, your engineer happens upon people who actually LIKE him, what are the odds that you’ll like them?
Yep, it’s best that you be in charge – even though you are always in charge and it will be less of a vacation for you. This way you will have some HAPPY memories of the trip that don’t include his inevitable suggestions – which are most likely to be educational, such as a tour of the ship’s engine room or a trip to a nearby factory to see how some useless gadget is made!
As always, you should be grateful for your engineer. Every one of your friends worries about what kind of people their husbands might be befriending during trips. You don’t have their problem, now do you?
Finally, be thankful that you didn’t marry an accountant. No matter how bad it might be, your engineer at least has a sense of humor. Smile, and enjoy another day full of wonder.
You are welcome!