There are people your engineer respects. Others, your engineer admires. Some, your engineer hates. But the vast majority – the ones your engineer considers to be too stupid to waste any of his time – he simply tolerates. Not well! But he does tolerate them all the same!

Let’s face it – it’s hard for an engineer to be tolerant!

After all, he’s worked hard to tune his mind to all the nuances of technical problem solving. It’s too bad that others don’t see the value in this capability, and therefore simply get down on their knees to worship your engineer and his ability to quickly address even the most complex technical issues.

So what’s a good engineer to do to address this concern?

Problem solve, of course… and that’s not necessarily a good thing, especially when the problem he’s solving is about the relationships between people – never one of your engineer’s strong suits.

Your engineer learned in school that one of the easiest ways to solve such a complex problem with so many possible variables, is to make a simplifying assumption. He then checks to see if there’s a conclusion that might work, then goes back and verify if the assumption holds in reality.

What’s a good assumption for why people don’t respect the technical capabilities of engineers?

Well,  people often don’t respect things they don’t fully understand. Maybe the people around your engineer don’t understand the technical capabilities he possesses.

Is it possible to check if the people who know your engineer are in this category (which would include all non-engineers in the world)? Sure. Once he asks these people a few technical questions, your engineer can quickly evaluate that their technical depth is not at his level. So, your engineer has logically proven his intellectual superiority over all these people, so now he must be tolerant of them.

What errors could there possibly be in this logic?

Other than it being engineer logic, of course!

Therefore, it completely disregards emotion. It also disregards the possibility that others do not respect the technical capabilities of engineers precisely because engineers do not respect the people skills everyone else in the world seems to possess.

Now, you, as the long suffering engineer’s spouse, could attempt to help your engineer see this hole in his logic, but it would be like trying to explain the color Sea Green (we think that’s the name of a real color, but being male, we’re not absolutely sure of that!) to someone who has been blind all his life!

Not that we’re saying that your engineer is blind in some regards.

Then again… maybe that’s exactly the problem!